error

Friday, February 24, 2006

Celebrate death.

I was contemplating changing my MSN display name when I saw a primary school friend of mine's display name, "My fish died."

I was contemplating changing mine to, "My great grand mother died."
But it's damn dumb lah.
So yup yup, applause to me from being any sillier then how I'm perceived to be according to my johari window so far~

So how am I not getting emo over yet another death in the family ?
Well, same reasons as that of approximately six months ago.
And they are,

1. I 'm not super close to my great grandmother considering the fact that she was getting rather senile when I was 10.

2. Her death was expected for quite some time now.
We initially thought she'd pass away around September last year.

3. I'm actually kinda relieved she's 'moved' on.

Heartless, cold blooded whatever, but you peeps haven't seen what I've seen of her these past few months. How clammy and lifeless her hands were. How shriveled up her body is, like some wilted flower, rivaling a twig in terms of thinness and lifelessly her eyes never opened no matter how hard she tried to keep awake. How she doesn't even recognise us anymore.

Therefore, I'm kinda traditional when it comes to death,just like my mum and her mum and my grandma's mum, I believe that the death of an aged relative should be celebrated, not mourned over. Afterall, they've lived a gooooooooood loooooooooooooooong life (nevermind the fact that I don't know whether is she content with her life) and judging by the insurmountable amount of pain she's been going through for the last few years (loss of mobility, loss of ability to feed oneself,loss of strength to even be awake,loss of memories of those dear to her), perhaps death really ought to be her best bet ticket out of our nasty world of pain,disease,sorrow and loss.
That's other then the point of her having lived a ripe number of 95 plus plus years. If that isn't ripe I really wonder what you peeps consider ripe man!

Yup yup, you could say she really did die of old age, perhaps it was dementia since I never saw her much after the "throw shit out of the 12th storey window" 'event' at my aunt's house, or some age-related disease which we never really got to hear about.

Since I'm such a loh-soh and naggy housewife-I-hope-NOT to be, I shall repeat the very same stuff I said 6 months ago.

When someone dear leaves us, they've never really left us.
Rather it's more of a temporary physical parting for all of us when a dear one moves on towards another stage for life. The dances are all the same, the difference lies in the stage.

And sooner or later, we'd finally all be together again, on the same stage, dancing our own little closet dances out in open.

Before that little reunion, I guess all we could do is to carry with us that person's memory, goodness,kindness and dreams with us , for through us, they live too.

But then again , that's just me lah.
And really, I'm ok.

:)

error

7:02 pm